Now we see Dr. Nambu’s villa, and we know that Jun is going above Ken’s head, in her concern for her little brother.



“So, Jinpei went by himself again.” Nambu says.



“Right.” Jun confirms. “We thought he’d give up soon and come home, but it’s been three days already.”



“You are supposed to work as a Team!” the Doctor lectures, as Ken and Jun sit down together on the couch.



Hmm… they both look kind of ‘guilty’ in this shot, don’t they? And what is Ken trying to hide with his crossed legs?

Ahem… sorry… back to the plot as written.

“Cut us a break here, Doc!” Ryu says, sitting down himself. “We never thought he was actually serious about going!”



“I want you all to go to the Himalayas too.” Nambu orders.

“I don’t think we should go all the way over there just to look for Jinpei.” Ken isn’t too thrilled with the idea.



“He may not look it, but he’s a member of the Science Ninja Team.” Joe says. Way to give a back-handed compliment, Joe!



“He’ll come rolling home when he gets fed up.” Joe adds.

“No, this is your assignment.” Nambu corrects him. “The ISO has requested that we investigate.”

“Don’t tell me they want us to capture the Abominable Snowman!” Ken says angrily.



“You guessed it, Ken.” the Doctor says in an amused tone. “You mission is just that.”

“Aw, but I hate mountain climbing!” Ryu whines. And while he sounds like a petulant five year old, I’m right there with him. Mountain-climbing, particularly in the snow, doesn’t excite me either!

“You’re all aware of the ISO’s theory that there may be a new energy source in the Himalayan mountains.” Nambu explains. “It’s been a month since they sent out the first expeditionary team, which was mostly composed of geologists. But they went missing a week ago.”

“This is the location.” Nambu points it out on the map. Does he use some high tech satellite imagery? Nope, he uses a pencil and an overhead machine.



“They’re extremely concerned about the safety of the expedition.” he adds. Frankly, I’m more concerned that the ISO, the freaking International Science Organization, is still using overhead machines instead of Google Earth. That may just be me, though.

“They came to the conclusion that they should seek our cooperation.” Nambu concludes.

“The Himalayas? I wonder how far we can take the God Phoenix.” Ken wonders.



“If we get in there too close, the rumble from the engines might just cause an avalanche.” Joe points out.

“I guess the farthest it can take us is the village at the foot of the mountains.” Ryu says. “Which is great! I’ll guard the ship, and you guys go ahead!” He laughs to himself, clearly pleased for once with his usual role.



“You’ve got a lot of nerve, taking the easy way out!” Jun lectures him.



“But staying behind and guarding the ship has always been my duty!” Ryu reminds her.



“A fat-ass person like you could do with a little mountain-climbing, my friend.” Joe points out.

“What are you doing looking at my ass?” Ryu demands.



I guess Ryu’s not turned on by a little yaoi!

I’m sorry, that line always makes me ! I think CD has used it in her siggie line, as well.

“We’ll try to go as far as we can, Doctor.” Ken promises.



We cut to Jinpei, who is driving across what I’m going to guess is the ‘flatlands’ of Nepal. Many people assume that Utoland must be in mainland Asia, since Jinpei drove all the way there, but he is in his civilian G-4. He could easily have transformed to go across an ocean. It did take him 3 days to travel to this point, after all.

“Almost there!” Jinpei thinks to himself. “Village of the unknown!”



Sure enough, there’s a large settlement ahead. It looks bigger than a village to me (A town, perhaps?) but what do I know?

Jinpei drives into the center of town, hops out of his dune buggy, and yells an enthusiastic ‘Hi!’ to the locals. No one seems to be concerned about a little kid driving through town. I guess in Nepal (or wherever) kids get driver’s licenses much younger.

“Hello, and welcome!” replies an enthusiastic local.

“I’m on my way to the Himalayas. Can I leave my car around here?” Jinpei asks.



“How many days are you going to be gone, young man?” the local asks. “The parking fee will depend on that.”

“What? I’ve got to pay to park?” Jinpei is outraged. I guess in Utoland, all parking is free?



“These days, we’ve been getting lots of tourists in the village, and they all pay to park.” the local explains. “If you don’t like it, you can go back where you came from.” What a great attitude!

“Hey, do you really get that many visitors?” Jinpei wants to know.

“Why yes!” the man laughs. “Tons of people come looking for the snowman!”

“Man, this sucks!” Jinpei thinks to himself, as he drives into the parking lot.



“Over here! To the left! You’re all clear!” the man directs him.

“Yeah, yeah…” grumbles Jinpei.

He is aghast when he sees all of the massive tour buses taking up the parking lot.

“Bunch of tour buses?” he exclaims. “Some adventure this is!”



Next this we know, Jinpei is dragging his massive pack up into the mountains.

“Man, this bites the big one!” he complains to himself. “I never should have come!”

He sure doesn’t seem to be wearing much for such bitterly cold weather.



“I guess it’s too late to go back now.” he says. He looks up at the huge crowds of people lined up the mountain path ahead of him.

“Unexplored like a theme park!” he sighs.

And finally, more than a third of the way through the episode, we get to see our villains.

“Lord Katse!” X shouts. “Tell me you’re going to remedy this situation!”



“Sire, please accept my deepest apologies!” Katse says, bowing. “It was entirely due to my subordinates’ laziness!”



“How are we supposed to do anything with all of these tourists pouring into our area of operation?” X wants to know. “We built this Himalayan base in order to obtain ore to feed our energy needs! Not to attract tourists!”

If you think about it, there are a lot of clues here that Galactor Headquarters is in the Himalayas, but of course it’s just unclear enough that the viewer wouldn’t necessarily suspect it.

Now we see the mountainside covered in tents at night. The tents, in turn, are covered in snow, as another storm is raging outside.

“This has ended up like a tent city with all these explorers here.” Jinpei says sadly to himself. “Guess I’m just part of the pack, huh?”

__________________

Next thing we know, Jinpei (in an ill-fitting goon uniform) is delivering lunch to Lord Katse himself.



“What, is that the truth, my Leader?” Katse asks, as Jinpei walks up.



“That’s Katse! Who’s he talking to?” Jinpei wonders.



“It was only momentary, but a Ninja Team-like signal was detected in the mountain.” X says, from a teeny weeny computer screen.



“Stay alert, Katse!” X warns. “An analysis of our failures would clearly reveal that the fault lies in the complacent carelessness of you and your subordinates!”

“For that I apologize, Leader.” Katse says. Jinpei is astounded to hear Katse groveling!



“Whoa, this is a surprise!” Jinpei says to himself. “There’s someone above Katse!”

“Who’s lurking over there?” Katse snarls. “I thought I told everyone to keep away from this chamber!”



The teeny weeny computer screen disappears into the floor just before Jinpei comes around the corner.

“Here’s your meal, Sire!” Jinpei says, in as deep a voice as he can.

“Oh, good!” Katse smiles. “Just leave it and get out. Can’t you see I’m busy, runt?”



“Sire!” Jinpei says, bowing.



The wall panel opens up and a sweeping view of the Himalayas lies beyond.

“Huh?” says Jinpei, raising his mask to see better.



“What are you waiting for?” Katse shouts. Jinpei quickly pulls down his mask and salutes.

Now we see Jinpei fixing the snowmobiles while Frenchy Goon and Dumb Goon goof off.



“Good work! Put some fuel in, while you’re at it!” says Dumb Goon.

“What? I have to do more?” Jinpei can’t believe it. “Aren’t you guys being kind of lazy over there?”



And yet again, we see the perfect propaganda to convince high school kids not to drink or smoke.



“You dumb-dumb! Why would Rufus want to bust his ass in these cold mountains?” Dumb Goon asks. I can’t tell if Rufus is supposed to be Dumb Goon or Frenchy Goon.

“What deadbeats!” Jinpei says. “I almost sympathize with Katse!”



You know, before the end of this episode, I think I’m actually sympathizing with Katse too! When you see these goons, suddenly all of Katse’s excuses about his bumbling subordinates make sense!

“The fuel tank is in the next room!” Frenchy Goon reminds Jinpei.

“Yeah.” Jinpei sighs, walking over. He presses a wall panel to open the door to the next room. And he literally walks into the Snowman!



“Wha… what’s this?” he asks fearfully.

“Surprised, kid?” Frenchy Goon laughs. “That’s the Snowman you came looking for! It’s Galactor’s ‘big secret’!”



“So it’s Galactor that’s been causing the commotion, huh?” Jinpei asks.

“There’s nothing to do, deep in the mountains, so we’ve been joyriding in it and scaring the villagers.” Frenchy Goon explains, in between swings from his bottle.





“Make sure you finish and you…” his words slur as he conks out. Dumb Goon is already asleep.

“Damn it!” Jinpei says, throwing his mask on the floor in disgust. He signals the Team again.



And the God Phoenix takes off, from its hiding place underneath the snow.

Back at Galactor Headquarters, X appears on his screen.



“Katse, you fool!” X says to himself. “The Science Ninja Team is in our midst! It’s time for me to step in.”

Back at the other base, Katse is unaware of this development.

“What? The God Phoenix has been sighted?” he asks. I guess he’s not totally unaware.



“Moron! Order the troops to assemble in the Great Hall!” Katse commands.

“Sire!” the goon bows and leaves.

Katse’s view changes, and suddenly we see Katse talking to the goons. Seems they assembled in the blink of an eye!

“You fools activated the Snowman just to terrorize the villagers!” Katse lectures. “Now the Science Ninja Team has arrived! That alone is a good enough reason to execute you all!”





But some of the goons aren’t paying attention to Lord Katse’s speech.



“I’m really disappointed that I have such useless subordinates!” Katse goes on. “Atone for your failure by protecting this base! Now, open the gates of the Beehive Fortress! Activate the Snowman mecha!”

We see snow falling off the mountainside, revealing a ‘honeycomb’ of missile launchers. I guess this is the Beehive Fortress.



But the God Phoenix continues merrily along its way.



“2,500 meters, 30 degrees to port.” Ken orders Ryu. “Now easy does it, Skipper!” Hey, I thought Mark was ‘Skipper’! Oh, right, wrong universe…



“2,500 meters, 30 degrees to port.” Ryu repeats, as he follows his instructions.



Katse watches the God Phoenix fly by from inside his base.



“There you are!” he says. “Just in time for me to smash your God Phoenix to pieces!”



“Altitude 2,100. Take us starboard, 15 degrees!” Ken calls.



Katse orders the Beehive Fortress to fire, and missiles shoot out at the God Phoenix.



“Phew!” Ryu sighs, once they get through. “They scared the hell out of me!”



“Take us over the same course again.” Ken orders.

“Huh? What’s you say?” Ryu is shocked.



“Wouldn’t it be a lot quicker to blast them with Super Birds, Ken?” Joe wants to know.

“We can conserve our missiles if we make them destroy themselves instead.” Ken points out.



“Destroy themselves?” Jun asks.



“An avalanche.” Ken explains. “Their attack must have loosened up the packed snow quite a bit. Ryu, let’s go!”

“All right.” Ryu agrees. “At least this is a lot easier than climbing a mountain!”

So the God Phoenix comes around for another pass, flying by the Beehive Fortress again.



“All those missiles, and it still can’t hit them?” Katse rants.



And now we learn why the goons are such poor shots. Frenchy Goon and Dumb Goon are lying on the ground, drunk.

“Is he saying something?” Frenchy slurs his words.



“He said, ‘do your job’!” Jinpei replies.

“Whatever.” Frenchy Goon takes another swig. “All he does is yell. He has no idea what it’s like out there.” Yep, this is about the point where I’m actually feeling sorry for Katse.

And meanwhile…

“They have no idea what I have to go through! I’m the one who takes the heat from Leader X!” Katse rants.



And at that moment, Ken is ordering Ryu to make another run past the missiles. And this time, it’s enough. An avalanche comes crashing down the mountain, burying the missile launching tubes.

“Hey, kid, bring me another one!” Dumb Goon calls, waving his bottle of alcohol.



But he’s surprised to find an empty uniform on the floor.



“Where did Runt go?” he asks.

“I’ll bet he got tired of being your little slave, and ran away.” Frenchy Goon says.

__________________

BOTP Episode 41 – The Alien Bigfoot

Even though Center Neptune, deep beneath the sea, must be ever on the alert for alien invaders from outer space, there are moments when everything is peaceful in the galaxy.

Ah, but Zark spoke too soon. Right now he’s on his way down his elevation tube to get to his control station. He only got to enjoy two seconds of his ten second oil break.



“And now I have an intriguing mystery on me hands!” Zark tells us, just before the Batman quick-change mechanism takes off his Numebr 7 sweater and put on his cape.



“Reports are coming from far-off Tibet about an alien Bigfoot roaming the Himalayas!” Zark says. Hmmm… how do these people know it’s alien? What makes him different from an Earth Bigfoot?

“It’s incredible that that old legend of a great, hairy beast roaming those mountains has survived until our time!” Zark is astounded by human ignorance.



Notice that this must be in the middle of the night, as the ocean is dark behind him.

“Two of our top scientists, Cameron and Ward, have been sent to investigate.” Zark says, after flying to his control panel. Wait… so this is an old legend (despite the ‘alien’ claim) and Zark is scoffing at it… but two scientists have been sent to investigate? I think there’s more than meets the eye…

“They’re old hands at mountain exploration,” Zark informs us, “and if there’s any truth to the rumors, they’ll find that Bigfoot!” He turns on his monitors.

“I’ll try to contact Cameron and Ward.” he says, and I notice that the sea has lightened a bit behind him. Perhaps the sun is rising as we speak.

“They should be close to the area where the alien Bigfoot has been reported.” Zark goes on. “But polar magnetic disturbances are fouling up my intermediate frequency transformers.”

How can you tell, Zark?



“Well, at least I’m finally getting a video scan of the Himalayas.” Zark voices over, as we see snow-covered mountains. “But they cover an awful lot of territory.” Good thing Zark just happens to be looking in the right place! We see a parade of snowmobiles heading up the mountain.

“Now I’ve got the scientific party on my monitor.” Zark says, as we see close-ups of the snowmobile trucks. “They’ve just made camp, and I know Cameron and Ward must be tired.” I’ll bet that’s not going to stop Peeping Zark from looking in on them anyway!

“I’ll contact them in the morning.” Zark decides. Perhaps he’s not as interested in scientists as he is in Princess’ uniform (or lack thereof).

We see Cameron and Ward sitting in their tent in the middle of a snowstorm.

“I’ve heard stories about Bigfoot wandering these mountain passes since I can remember.” one of the men says. Is it Cameron or Ward? Your guess is as good as mine. “They get wilder all the time.”

“Probably just some old yak.” replies the other scientist. Yeah, that’s why they carted their butts and this large expedition up to this frigid place. Riiiight.

“No, I don’t think so.” the first scientist says.

“You think he’s real?” the second asks.

And we cut to a shot of the Bigfoot, with its glowing red eyes, and a blast of ‘warning’ music.

“Isn’t that what we were sent up here to find out?” the first scientist responds.

Insert another scary shot of the red-eyed Bigfoot.

“Seems a bit much, doesn’t it?” scientist #2 says. “A big, hairy monster living up here in the mountains?” Let me guess… he’s the skeptic on the team?

“Yeti, the natives call him.” says scientist #1.

“I’ll believe it when I see him. And I really don’t expect to see him.” scientist #2 says, kicking back. But just then, their tent is crushed by a massive, hairy foot!

Scientist #1 peeks his head out of the tent’s remains, just in time to see the Bigfoot picking up an entire truck and throwing it. He signals for help, and there is an explosion…

Oh no! Did Cameron and Ward make it?

Before we can ponder the fate of the two scientists for long, we cut to Ready Room Disco. Princess and Keyop are playing to the beat, Tiny is eating Spaceburgers, and Mark and Jason are playing ping pong.



So what else is new?

“This is the first time I ever danced a game of ping pong.” Jason comments.



“Hey, Princess, can you pick up the beat?” Mark asks. “I don’t play my best game at that speed.”



Now I have to wonder why he’s asking Princess. Keyop’s the one playing the drums (and therefore controlling the beat) after all. Perhaps Mark just wants to see Princess’ hips swing faster as she plays.

Certainly, from this shot, it doesn’t look like Mark is paying much attention to the game.



He looks like he got a hernia trying to suck in his gut!

“Sorry, we play for music lovers, not muscle men!” Princess says, her electric mandolin doing a poor job of masking her man-shoulders.



“Arrooot! Want faster?” Keyop asks, performing a drum solo at top speed.



And yep, you guessed it…. Mark hits a wild shot…



And knocks a Spaceburger out of Tiny’s hand.



OMG… sorry…. must take laughing break…

And Keyop is still playing his solo!

“Brooot toot! Muscle builder beat!” he exclaims as he finishes.

Zark appears on the screen to interrupt the goings-on.

“Attention, G-Force!” he calls.



“I have a red alert! Our scientists, Cameron and Ward, have just sighted an alien Bigfoot in the Himalayas! They took one look, and got out fast!” Oh, well, that’s all right then. I guess they survived!

“They’re safely on their way home now, but the Bigfoot is continuing to terrorize the entire area.” Zark goes on. “Stand by! You may be called on at any moment to go there. Security Chief Anderson has promised to make a decision quickly!”



And Zark fades out.

“G-Force!”



And we cut to a shot of Keyop loading a massive backpack into his detransmuted Space Buggy.

“I’ll go!” he burbles. “Capture Bigfoot!”

He drives away from Jill’s in the middle of the night. Next thing you know, Mark’s communicator is beeping.

“I read you, Princess.” he says, as he wakes up. He sits up in his bed. Hmmm… seems like he’s used to getting messages from Princess while in bed…

“It’s Keyop! He just took off!” Princess reports. “He said he was going to capture that monster Bigfoot all by himself!”

“Get him on your communicator! Tell him to get back here!” Mark orders her. Well, duh, don’t you think she would have tried that already?

“I tried, Mark, but he doesn’t answer my call!” Princess says. “He’s determined!”

“Well, I wouldn’t worry, he won’t go far.” Mark replies. “Anyway, there’s no such animal as Bigfoot!” And he ducks back under his covers.

“Look, Princess, don’t get all worked up.” Jason says, as he is now apparently the one being appealed to. “You know Keyop when he gets an idea! He’ll be back soon with some hairy story!” And Jason goes into his trailer and lies down on his bed.

“He’ll never go all the way to Tibet alone.” Jason says to himself.

We cut back to Center Neptune, and Zark’s voiceover tells us that Security Chief Anderson has finally made his decision. So much for it being fast! The Team had a chance to go back to their homes and hang out for awhile!

“Along with the reports of Bigfoot, we’re now getting reports of spaceships mysteriously crashing while coming in for Earth landings!” Zark says. “I advised Chief Anderson that the two things may be linked, somehow.” Oh, Zark, you’re soooo smart!

“You’re one short. Where’s Keyop?” Anderson asks as the Team files into his office.

“He took off on his own for the Himalayas.” Princess reports. “To capture Bigfoot.”

“That was rash and impetuous. You work as a Team!” the Chief lectures. Too bad Keyop’s not present to hear it!

“What’s the emergency, Chief?” Tiny asks, sitting down. “Zark tells us it was another red alert.”

“Three spaceships have crashed since yesterday.” Anderson says.

“What?” Tiny is shocked.

“The space landing entry system has been perfected for years!” Mark protests.

“It would only take our friend Zoltar from Planet Spectra five minutes to mess it up.” Jason points out.

“Could be.” Anderson agrees. “One of the space freighters came down in the Himalayas.”

“Any clue yet as to what went wrong?” Mark asks.

“Inertial guidance systems went out just before entry.” Anderson replies.

“That’s got to be good old Zoltar, Chief!” Tiny says.

__________________

“You’re pretty handy with tools, kid!” Dumb Goon notes. “Now we’ve got a big two-legged machine that needs fixing!” So let me get this straight… the Spectran goons want a kid to fix their big robot? Perhaps Dumb Goon was the right name after all!

“Where is it?” Keyop burbles.

“In the storeroom, back there.” Dumb Goon replies.

“Eeh… slave drivers!” Keyop mutters as he walks over. He opens the door and gasps, after literally walking into the Bigfoot.

“Bigfoot!” he exclaims.

“Oh, it’s nothing but a pile of junk, run by Zitronium batteries!” laughs Frenchy Goon.

“Scared me!” Keyop says.

“That’s what it’s supposed to do!” Frenchy Goon replies. “Scare people and keep them from nosing around up here! Now, see if you can fix its motor and get it going again!” Frenchy goon lurches in his seat. Dumb Goon is already sleeping.

“Fix it good!” Keyop says, throwing his mask onto the floor in disgust. He signals on his communicator.

We see the Phoenix rising up from out of the snow on the mountainside.

In an unknown location, the Luminous One appears on his screen. It’s his big audience chamber, not the teeny weeny screen. You’d think he was on Spectra, but…

“I told you we’d have trouble, Zoltar!” the Great Spirit says. “G-Force is headed this way! Assemble your men immediately!”

So apparently he’s not on Spectra, and actually in the Earth base somewhere. Odd…

“Sound the assembly alert!” Zoltar orders one of the goons. He flicks a switch, and is now addressing the goons.

“Mighty Spirit has just informed me that G-Force has discovered our hideout and is on the way here! Our defenses will quickly rout them! Now, back to your posts! Get ready for the assault by G-Force!”

Sue enough, snow falls off the mountainside, revealing a number of missile-launching tubes. But we get a ‘money shot’ of the Phoenix approaching, to the swelling sounds of Hoyt Curtain’s orchestra.

“We’re coming in, dead on target!” Mark announces. “Activate repeller force field, Tiny!”

“Repeller force field, activated!” Tiny says, pulling on some levers.

“They are here!” Zoltar notes, seeing the Phoenix approaching on his screen. “All batteries stand ready and prepare to open fire!”

“Move in close, Tiny!” Mark orders. “Give that mountain a dusting.”

“Open fire!” Zoltar calls, as the Phoenix approaches, and the missiles go… but the Phoenix is unharmed!

“Boy, I’m sure glad to get through that!” Tiny says, once they’re out.

“Well, get ready to go back.” Mark says.

“Through that again?” Tiny is shocked.

“Keyop’s still down there somewhere!” Jason reminds them. Boy, of all of them, he’s certainly the one expressing the most concern for Keyop, this episode.

“I know, but he’s the one who gave us the signal to attack!” Mark reminds Jason.

“He’ll be right in it!” Princess protests.

“He wouldn’t give us the word if he didn’t have a plan.” Mark points out. “One more flyby, Tiny.”

“I just hope Keyop knows what he’s doing!” Tiny grumbles.

And the Hoyt Curtain music swells again as the Phoenix flies by once more. And again they emerge unscathed.

“I’d give anything to know how they do it!” Zoltar rants. “Right through my heaviest batteries!”

“I’ve got an idea.” Mark says. “Lot of snow piled up there…”

We see the missiles loading inside the Spectra base, and one shoots at the Phoenix. The Phoenix avoids it, but it hits the mountainside. The Phoenix flies through the battery again, and more missiles shoot out.

“We did it! Those explosions have started an avalanche!” Mark announces. Sure enough, snow is cascading down the mountainside. It buries the missile batteries, even going inside the base, but we don’t see any goons flailing in the snow.

“We’ve got to get out! Everyone evacuate this area!” Zoltar orders.

But the Bigfoot is coming to life. It stands up and crashes through a wall, scaring the pants off some goons. Then it bursts through the floor of Zoltar’s office!

“What are you doing here?” Zoltar demands.

And the next thing you know, the Phoenix is breaking through the wall of Zoltar’s office!

“And now, G-Force!” Zoltar cries fearfully, turning to run. But Keyop’s bolas come out of the Bigfoot’s nostrils and wrap around Zoltar’s legs, tripping him.

“Doot doot… got him!” Keyop exclaims.

“Good shot, Keyop!” Mark calls, as the dome on the Phoenix lowers to reveal the Commander, Jason and Princess.

“I did it! Got Bigfoot… and Zoltar!” Keyop burbles proudly. “Broot toot… by myself!”

Zoltar is horrified, especially when Mark approaches him.

“You’ve won… let me go!” he whispers.

“No way! This is the moment we’ve all been waiting for!” Mark says, grabbing Zoltar by his cloak. “I’ve never seen you without your mask. Now!”

“No… not that!” Zoltar croaks.

“Let’s see!” Mark shouts, pulling off the mask.

And we see… long blonde hair spilling out! Zoltar is covering his face, and a bright light appears behind him. The G-Force Team is blinded!

The Luminous one appears, and he’s…. giggling?

“You fools!” he berates them. “Do you think you can stand against the mystic power of Spectra’s actual ruler? See how easily I render you helpless? My powers are greater than yours, G-Force! Sooner or later, I shall succeed in conquering your planet!” He continues to giggle, and the Team collapses from the effects of his power.

Sorry, but the Luminous One’s giggling just doesn’t sound very ominous. And if his power were all that great, why wouldn’t he just kill G-Force then and there?

Now we see the Team lying unconscious on the floor of Zoltar’s ruined office… except for Tiny, who is snoozing on the Phoenix. Mark and Princess get up.

“It’s gone.” the Commander says, as Jason stands up.

“Like some weird ghost.” Jason adds.

“Was it a dream, or did I really see Zoltar with long, blonde hair?” Mark asks. Clearly the big reveal here was not the presence and power of the Luminous One, but Zoltar’s hair.

“I saw it too, Mark, but maybe we were both dreaming.” Princess replies.

“Wig, maybe?” Keyop asks, after a lot of burbling.

“Maybe. It just seems too far out for the evil ruler of Spectra to be a woman.” Mark says. “But for a second, I sure thought I saw one…”

Get that, kiddies? In this show with no violence, we’re all going to be sexist and say that anybody with long hair is a woman! The Commander of G-Force said so! Not only that, women can’t be evil enough to be the main villain! Phew! Thanks for setting me straight in my gender role, Mark.

“Zoltar a woman?” Tiny laughs, back on the Phoenix. “All of you need a long vacation, or they’re going to start looking into your heads!” And this is disturbing too. Why couldn’t the Leader of Spectra be female? I’m still trying to grapple with this one…

Mark doesn’t respond.

“Sorry, Commander.” Tiny apologizes. “That just kind of slipped out, you know?”

And you know, as kids, we all bought this. At my school, the word was rife: Zoltar was a woman! I had that ‘secret’ repeated to me even a decade later, when I was in undergrad, and we were talking about the TV shows we used to watch as kids. “Did you know that Zoltar was really a woman?” And all from this one episode…

Of course, it never occurred to any of us that Zoltar and Mala were really the same person. That would have blown our minds!

We see the Phoenix flying off into the sunset, to the sound of mournful flute music.

“The threat of the Disruptor Beam is gone, buried in the rubble of Spectra’s secret base.” Zark voices over. “And the mystery of Bigfoot is solved! But now we’re faced with an even greater mystery… Was that Zoltar with long, blonde hair, who disappeared in the energy blast? I wonder if we’ll ever know?” And the answer is of course both ‘yes’ and ‘no’. In BOTP, this was as close as they ever got to ‘revealing’ Zoltar, but in Gatchaman, we learned so much more…

“Seeing a terrible mechanical monster like that alien Bigfoot almost makes me ashamed to admit I’m a robot too!” Zark says, his metal head sparkling.



And 1-Rover-1 is so ashamed that he’s hiding his head.



“Don’t worry, 1-Rover-1.” Zark assures him. “Robots like you are very friendly and intelligent and loving.”

And at that opportune moment, Susan drops down from the ceiling!



Okay, not Susan, but her communicator binocular-box thing.

“And what about me, Zark?” she asks.

“Oh, yes, Susan, robots like you are certainly very friendly!” Zark answers, clearly flustered. If he were human, he’d be sweating bullets. “And intelligent, and… well, I don’t really know if you’re loving.”

“Try me…” Susan breathes.



“Ooh, my!” Zark exclaims. “I don’t know if… I mean, c-c-could you call back later, Susan? When I’m… alone?” Lucky Rover! He’ll be spared Zark and Susan’s sex talk. If only we were so lucky.

“It’ll be… my pleasure.” Susan says huskily, before her communication thingy disappears back into the ceiling.

“I wonder if being kissed by a girl is anything like being kissed by a dog?” Zark asks himself, as he pulls Rover close.



And the scene fades out. I shudder to think of what will happen next to poor Rover, as this smacks entirely too much of a sexual predator left alone with a child. Ewwwww…..

Fortunately, this episode is over.

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So many things in this episode review had me laughing TJ! You were in right form when you wrote it!

When I first saw this episode I was a wee lass of about 11 with long white blonde hair down to my butt, two sisters - one of which is the only person I am still scared of today - and a mother who taught us that girls can be anything and do anything they want. I believe my response to Mark's belief that a woman couldn't be the evil ruler of Spectra got me grounded for a month...

It was also probably about the time that I switched my allegiance to Jason...

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Exaggeration misleads the credulous and offends the perceptive. ~Eliza Cook

When I saw the line of tourists on the mountain, I had to chuckle. Were the folks at Tatsunoko indulging in a bit of social commentary?

Because it's pretty true. Climbing Everest has become the thing to do, and if there were a reliable Yeti sighting, the Himalayas would be buried under tourists. Hell, there would be so many people there the Earth would shift on its axis.

The majority of Galactor goons have been pretty stupid throughout the show. Lately, they've been downright idiotic. Yeah, gotta feel for Katse. It's hard to conquer the planet when your minions are dumber than dirt.

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Benefits, not features; benefits, not features

Definitely cute, Gatchamarie!!

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"When I'm old, I don't want them to say of me, "She's so charming." I want them to say, "Be careful, I think she's armed." -G. Stoddart

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Marie, you picked out two wonderful screenshots to put together! And yes, so much the SNT didn't know... the funny thing is, there have been so many Galactor bases all over the world, that when they talk about this one in this episode, we think it's 'just another base' and not the 'energy substation' for Galactor Headquarters! And none of us question why X is directly interfering in this instance and not before... we just assume that it was to save Katse!

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To be or not to be a gatchamaniac - that's the dilemma!