Gatchamania.net - Print: Dreams do come true

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Posted by kimiko on 15-02-2008 at 18:02:

I love the whole Blue Collar Comedy thing...

My BIL's brother looks just like Larry the Cable Guy...

I just thought of something else that would qualify me as a redneck....Redneck Tobogganing...

Step 1: BIL's brother has a party at his place out in the boonies.

Step 2: Gets everyone hammered (Jello shooters are the specialty of the house)

Step 3: Gets as many people as he can to get bundled up in snowsuits and sits them on an old wooden toboggan.

Step 4: Ties toboggan to shitty old Chevy pickup with no brakes and royally f*cked transmission.

Step 5: Guns it and does doughnuts over the large yard, loosing most of us on the first try.

Step 6: Keeps repeating Step 5 until riders are freezing, soaked, noxious from truck fumes, but generally had a blast and need more alcohol.

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Posted by Hinotori on 15-02-2008 at 23:40:

quote:

Originally posted by Springie
Bwahahahaha...I lived in Tennessee for five years, and I've lost most of the accent (I think...what do you think TJ and GatchGirl?) but I *still* say "bless his/her heart" alot...that is so funny...I didn't think about it being southern, but I picked that phrase up while I lived there... pound

Well, Springie, it looks we have something in common!

Gosh, all the hick stories I could tell from when I lived in the South.... I think my favorite one is when I was at a hick bar one night, watching my friend's band... I was sitting with his sister and her boyfriend when this skinny, toothless, dark-haired hick walks up to me (I guess I should say that everytime I went to this bar, I was always picked up by a skinny, toothless, 40+ year old hick, which became a huge running joke with my friends!).

So this hick walks up to me. Now I'm pretty good about humoring these people, but this guy was just way too redneck for this northern girl...(ie: scary). He starts asking me to go outside with him... I tell him no. Then he asks if I'm here with anyone (ie: boyfriend). Unfortunately, that night it was pretty obvious I wasn't... So like an idiot, I say "no". Then he starts getting an idea...

"Oh, so are you friends with the band?" he says in his native drawl.

"Yes." I tell him, "The guitar player is my brother." (I couldn't use the wife excuse because my friend had his wedding band on)

The hick looks at me (I'm white as a ghost and at the time was very skinny), he looks at my friend (who has much darker skin tone than me, looks absolutely nothing like me, and has a very athletic build), looks at me again and says, "He's your brother??"

"Yes" I say again, then quickly add "I'm adopted."

The look on this guy's face was priceless!

"Oh.." he says, totally perplexed, then he walks off....

Ok, maybe it's not as funny in the retelling as it was when it actually happened. But I'm laughing just thinking about it!

G-d I loved messing around with the rednecks down there!!!

I'll have to tell you about the time I got lost and stopped to ask for directions - and literally couldn't understand a word the guy was saying!!! ROFL 2

Do I hear banjos in the background????

__________________
Hinotori
Eagle in Charge

Eagle Condor Swan Swallow Hootie

Posted by Hinotori on 15-02-2008 at 23:43:

quote:

Originally posted by kimiko
And racing each other on the backroads of Cambridge in the Trans-Ams to see who could get to Puslinch Lake first. Now there's a redneck place name if I ever hear of one!

It's not nearly as bad as Palatka!!!

__________________
Hinotori
Eagle in Charge

Eagle Condor Swan Swallow Hootie

Posted by Hinotori on 15-02-2008 at 23:47:

quote:

Originally posted by kimiko
I just thought of something else that would qualify me as a redneck....Redneck Tobogganing...

Step 1: BIL's brother has a party at his place out in the boonies.

Step 2: Gets everyone hammered (Jello shooters are the specialty of the house)

Step 3: Gets as many people as he can to get bundled up in snowsuits and sits them on an old wooden toboggan.

Step 4: Ties toboggan to shitty old Chevy pickup with no brakes and royally f*cked transmission.

Step 5: Guns it and does doughnuts over the large yard, loosing most of us on the first try.

Step 6: Keeps repeating Step 5 until riders are freezing, soaked, noxious from truck fumes, but generally had a blast and need more alcohol.

Congratulations, Kimi, you are officially a redneck!!! Or at least you are definitely related to one!!!!

Ahh, Blue Collar Comedy, gosh I love them! And let me tell you, all those jokes have so much more significance after you've lived everything they say! I love all the comics, all, but I think Bill Engvel's routines are the best. I love "Here's your sign"!! Cracks me up everytime. Of course Jeff Foxworthy's "You Might be a Redneck if..." usually has me ROFLMAO!

__________________
Hinotori
Eagle in Charge

Eagle Condor Swan Swallow Hootie

Posted by Springie on 16-02-2008 at 00:26:

quote:

Originally posted by Hinotori

quote:

Do I hear banjos in the background????

OMG,Hino, that's hillarious! There are some pretty strange characters down there! Of course, I married into a family of them...YIPES!!

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Posted by Ebonyswanne on 16-02-2008 at 03:07:

Aww that was sooo touching to read FB...very romantic you write in first person so well...tears stung my eyes reading it.

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Posted by Firebird on 16-02-2008 at 11:52:

I try to in fact I am at the stage where writing thrid person is hard lol

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