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Posted by lborgia88 on 21-05-2010 at 12:45:

I'm sorry that Josh is having such a hard time, SJ! I can only imagine how it must make a parent feel, when their child is unhappy about something or having problems. Huggles

I can't offer any parenting or teaching advice, but from the suggestions offered here, it sure sounds like there are methods and programs out there that can help Josh cope better with school and the frustrations it's causing him. Institutions, by their very nature, so often take a "one size fits all" approach when in reality, so many of us don't fit a standard mold.

I'm sure that the help Josh needs to be happier in school is out there, and that you will be able to find it.

Posted by gatchamarie on 21-05-2010 at 14:19:

Dear SJ ... even if maybe I'm late, I join the others in hugging you! You surely must be passing through a very hard time. I know what it feels like to feel for your own children and it's quite heart-wrenching, tiresome and sad, but it also shows what a good mother you are!

I have different experiences from yours with my children, which cannot make me a good candidate to help you in any way by experience. I have an oversensitive boy, with his own problems, and a slightly hyperactive girl with whom we've now learnt how to deal. I can only tell you that no matter how, or who, your kids are, they're always your kids and your treasure and you never want to see them suffer.

I cannot give you a lot of additional advice ... all was greatly tackled by the others who have already posted. I just wish to emphasize on the fact that, as the others have already pointed out, the earlier you seek for specialists' advice the better. This does not mean that that's the case ... from what you've told us, your treasure really seems a gifted boy! But, you surely need to put your mind at rest before acting strategically.

A close friend of mine recently has had almost the similar problem with her boy. He's hyperactive, he always wants to be the boss, he gets annoyed with the usual kindergarten schedule, he's very creative and observant, and he was being avoided by his classmates because he looked different from them in their eyes ... he always played by himself because he didn't enjoy what the others were playing being something relative to their age. He always had the language barrier problem also because his mother is English and English is his first language, thus making things worse. Instead of understanding him, his teacher gave him a lot of punishments and didn't give him any attention, pushing him aside. With that attitude against him, the child had become more frustrated. It has been a school issue rather than that of a problematic child and my friend struggled to confirm her theory that her son was not the kind of child depicted by his educators who also told her that he was bullying other kids. She also struggled to extract the right information from his school but she never gave up and found out that the school itself was the real problem.

Did your son ever tell you that he's not happy with his school's environment or with his teachers? My friend's son used to tell her so and when she changed his school he became a very different person. She's now telling me what a sweet child she's finding in her own son other than the irrative, swearing and tempered one that she used to have at home after school hours.

I hope things will turn out better for you, dear Huggles ... and don't worry, a good mother will always be rewarded!

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To be or not to be a gatchamaniac - that's the dilemma!

Posted by littlewolf on 23-05-2010 at 11:15:

Your son is so lucky to have a determined, caring mother, who is willing to reach out and look beyond the boundaries.
My nephew was disgnosed with Asperga, but not until he was in his late teens, we knew he was a smart child, but different and because he was different the other children were mercilous, we did not know this until later, the teacher at his school were overworked with other problem children, so he just got lost in the system and he would not talk to us, we tried so many things and he got "labeled", it is and was frustrating.
Now 6years later, he is so much happier, his "gift" is science and computers, he helps out at the local community center in a small mining town and he is well loved, his differences are excepted, and we have all learned from him, sometimes it is hard to be patient with him and we all get frustrated, he more than us now.
My Great niece was diagnosed with "Global Disaster Dysfunction" up until she was 3.5yrs old she did not speak, respond to anything, there was no emotions, she just sat there, almost in total overload unable to process what was going on around her, now at 5yrs old she speaks a few words, and she laughs and smiles and is attending school with other children she grew up with.It's slow , but it's happening.
The whole process is slow and frustrating and sometimes it seems so dark that you can't see any light, and hindsight seems so far away, and there are some many new labels to for what is happening to children now....
It apprears to me by reading this thread that you already have the start of a very strong support system, and Josh is a very lucky boy to have a mother like you who cares enough to look for answers
and reach out to others for advise, please remember also to look after yourself, sometimes we forgot our attention was so focused on finding out what and why and how, our health suffered, and that did not help my nephew or my great niece.

LW: lights a candle in her window, hoping it will guide you back to your safe, warm and peaceful home and that it will attract the guidance you need to find the answers you seek
Huggles Huggles

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May the bad things get lost on the way to you door!