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--- Seeking (http://www.gatchamania.net/threadid.php?threadid=242)
Posted by Buffy on 22-06-2004 at 01:38:
Seeking
"Emotionally secure voluptuous woman is seeking open-minded guy for passionate evenings out with adventurous mornings after. Contact Buffy care of Gatchamania if interested. " 
*************
Hehe. I found this on another BBS I belong to!
*****************
DICTIONARY FOR WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS:
40-ish.............................................49
Adventurous.................Slept with everyone
Athletic......................................No tits
Average looking....................Ugly
Beautiful...........................Pathological liar
Contagious Smile..................Does a lot of pills
Emotionally Secure......................On medication
Feminist..........................................Fat
Free spirit....................................Junkie
Friendship first..........................Former slut
Fun..........................................Annoying
New-Age..............Body hair in the wrong places
Old-fashioned.............................No BJs
Open-minded.................................Desperate
Outgoing........................Loud and Embarrassing
Passionate...............................Sloppy drunk
Professional....................................Bitch
Voluptuous...................................Very Fat
Large frame.................................Hugely Fat
Wants Soul mate...............................Stalker
__________________
"Spider sense....tingling."
Posted by Elvin Ruler on 22-06-2004 at 02:41:
*snicker*
Definitely gives one something to do when bored with only a newspaper. ^_^
__________________
What if there is a spoon? 
Posted by Firebird on 22-06-2004 at 06:43:
Certainly an interesting read.
Now whats the guy version I wonder? 
or maybe we could come up with something like that for each team member as a challenge?
__________________
Like the Phoenix I rise from the fire. Beware all who try to tame me, you may get burned 
Posted by Cep on 22-06-2004 at 08:11:
I have to admit this key is 100% correct!
....err.....not that I have ever read these adds *coughs* 
Anyway Bufster I don't care if your on medication *huggles* 
hehe
__________________
Thanks Cep
Gatchamania.net Administrator 
Posted by Lolabella on 22-06-2004 at 13:28:
And now here is the male side:
THE MALE SIDE OF THE LIST
40-ish.................. 52 and looking for a 25-yr-old
Athletic................ Sits on the couch and watches ESPN
Average looking...... Unusual hair growth on ears, nose, & back
Educated............... Will always treat you like an idiot
Free Spirit.............. Sleeps with your sister
Friendship first........ As long as friendship involves nudity
Fun....................... Good with remote and a six pack
Good looking........... Arrogant
Honust.................. Pathetic Liar
Huggable............... Overweight, more body hair than a bear
Like to cuddle......... Insecure, overly dependent
Mature................... Until you get to know me
Open-minded........... Wants to sleep with your sister but
she's not interested
Physically fit............ I spend a lot of time in front of the
mirror admiring myself
Poet....................... Has written on a bathroom wall
Spiritual.................. Once went to church with his
grandmother on Easter Sunday
Stable..................... Occasional stalker, but never arrested
__________________
Posted by Cep on 22-06-2004 at 16:00:
Think I'll add my version of the male one.
40-ish.................. 52 and looking for an 18-yr-old
Athletic................ Pigeon chested, skinny whippet legs
Average looking...... Not good looking
Educated............... Is always right
Free Spirit.............. Sleeps with anyone
Friendship first........ If your too ugly
Fun....................... When can be bothered
Good looking........... Arrogant, smug git
Honest.................. Pathetic Liar
Huggable............... Overweight, more body hair than a bear
Like to cuddle......... Insecure, overly dependent
Mature................... Until you get to know me
Open-minded........... Would like you, your sister and possibly your mother if your all under 40
Physically fit............ On roids
Poet....................... Has read but not wrote
Spiritual.................. weirdo
Stable..................... can't get anyone else, no self esteem
__________________
Thanks Cep
Gatchamania.net Administrator
Posted by Buffy on 22-06-2004 at 16:27:
You guys crack me up.
__________________
"Spider sense....tingling."
Posted by imaqtz on 22-06-2004 at 17:14:
To Buffy @ Gatchamania.
This Stable, Honest , Good Looking free spirited, physically fit poet would love to take you on an adventurous ride.
Please Contact G2@ISO
P.S.... Whats your ASL BTW?
__________________
Shoot first..ask questions later!
Posted by Tengu on 22-06-2004 at 19:08:
The people who put these ads up are losers.
Believe me, Ive tried it.
`Young woman with yacht seeks man with Plane`
I was trying for G5 but got Rat Bastard instead....
__________________
"If you think I am a Condor, you may keep that opinion;
Though I am no Condor, my Skylines rusty enough."
Posted by Firebird on 22-06-2004 at 19:12:
Though anyone answering G2's add needs to make sure they are immortal or at the very least bullet proof and have lots of life insurance with a will already made up.
Love all the guy ones some are so very very true!
__________________
Like the Phoenix I rise from the fire. Beware all who try to tame me, you may get burned
Posted by Buffy on 23-06-2004 at 00:51:
| quote: | |
|
Errr....Only if yer unwilling to settle.
Buffy busily writes a reply to Mr. G2@ISO...complete with perfume, 3 x 5 glossies (touched), room key, and a pair of lacy unmentionables inclosed, all the while humming 'I shot the sheriff' under her breath....(and secretly contemplating a speedy getaway in Sweetheart afterwards)
__________________
"Spider sense....tingling."
Posted by Tengu on 23-06-2004 at 19:04:
That will scare him off alright!
He wont touch a blobnde for months after!
__________________
"If you think I am a Condor, you may keep that opinion;
Though I am no Condor, my Skylines rusty enough."
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