Gatchamania.net - Print: Books you would not recommend

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Posted by Firebird on 29-04-2004 at 07:03:

Books you would not recommend

Now being the strange individual I am (Yes I freely admit this!!)

I am wondering are their any books people have read that they would not recommend?

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Posted by Buffy on 29-04-2004 at 09:20:

Hehe...Would be interesting to see who likes what in spite of the bad reviews here?

Yes! I have one. Though I am sure the warning only applies to a small percentage of this site due to the genre in question.

I would not recommend any Cassie Edwards Romance Novel.

She does a series of native american historical romance novels though the 'native american historical' part is beyond dubious.

Now I admit I have always been a closet historical romance novel fan. They are like comfort junk food for the brain: Same basic plot, saccerine and ambiguous sex scenes heavy on the metaphors, same basic Irish Lass heroine who must have creamy white skin (grunt), a name that sounds like the latest Estee Lauder perfume, and long flowing locks, innocent bla bla bla. But hey, the men are usually hot. well endowed, and they are guaranteed a happy ending.

That aside. Why is it Cassie Edwards feels the need to romanticize the language and relationship to the point that it makes one's teeth ache? And for god's sake, WHY does she feel the need to describe orgasm with the name of the novel in EVERY FREAKING TIME? ...and they reached fulfillment in a rush of savage thunder that left them both sated and fulfilled with fulfillment because of the intense savage thunder that thundered through them savagely....because Savage Thunder was the name of their book....

Now that would be forgivable. After all, we're talking romance novel here: The Lick'em Stix of the literature world.

What really killed me was the fact that she uses clumsy improbable plot devices to solve all the random story threads as often as she religiously can. ( I think there's a term for that even... 'deus ex mechina' or something?)

True example: Brave and handsome native stud loves innocent but in trouble white chick. However, he can't go with her because he is responsible for his adored deaf/blind/mute from birth younger brother who cannot travel with them. Hmmm...problem.

Does brother get conveniently stampeded off a cliff in a freak buffalo accident you ask? No, not even that predictable. Brother goes to cave on spirit quest and is in the vicinity of a freak meteor strike, the shockwaves and radiation emissions of which miraculously restore both his hearing and his sight. The brother then goes on to learn to speak and fully function in the tribe within a couple of months or so, managing to snag the sexiest little chick in the village for his own and become a top notch hunter and provider too. (The native chick's name was probably 'Gentle Fawn' or 'Morning Dove' or some such crap to boot). I'm admittedly a little hazy on the aftermath because I started skipping pages to hasten the end of the book at that point.

Bleeech. I guess in my defense, I was 16 when I read my first Cassie Edwards and was distracted by the bronze manly chests. I haven't read one in 10 years until last week.

No, I won't read one ever again. And neither should anyone else for the love of all that is cheesy.

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Posted by Cep on 29-04-2004 at 11:21:

Well Buffy you can count on me never to do so Wink

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Posted by Tengu on 29-04-2004 at 13:04:

me too

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Posted by meridianday on 29-04-2004 at 13:32:

Yeah, that really sounds like an author to miss out on...

I've generally been quite lucky in my reading choices. And I'm also blessed with a short memory, so that unless a book has somehow tricked me into reading all the way through, with the promise that somehow it's all going to be worth it, instead of just making me give up in the first couple of pages, I'm unlikely to remember it.

One book I started about 3 years ago and still haven't finished is Atom by Tom Aylett. Every time I pick it up, I am astounded by his use of language and his imagination and the startling technology, and then I read through a chapter, and I end up thinking he's just taken too many drugs instead and put it down again for another 6 months Wink But if I was able to find his work accessible, I would love it so much.

The other thing is finding a book that you loved as a teenager and then reading it again as an adult. It's never the same... so disappointing.

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Posted by CricketBeautiful on 29-04-2004 at 14:29:

Only read one thing by her, and only the first few chapters, but avoid Jilly Cooper.

Seems to think it's slap-stick humour to have rich druggies adopting third-world kids.

Doesn't even describe the sex (of which there is plenty -- the town's name is ruttsville) in enough detail to count as porn.

Cricket

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Posted by Elvin Ruler on 29-04-2004 at 15:49:

I have an odd un-recommendation (seems that everyone *likes* this book). Great Expectations by Charles Dickens. 500 pages of boredom ending with an almost climactic scene.

Romance books are evil. They scare me even more than doggerel. I'd rather be kidnapped by aliens. Abduct3

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Posted by Tengu on 29-04-2004 at 17:32:

I never liked Dickens. Im told he is good.

It would take a very brave alien to come near me. One look at my sardonic collection of anti or alternative theory UFO books and they know there is no hope for them.

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Posted by Cep on 29-04-2004 at 17:32:

yes...*rubs hands*...must get more doggeral Alien1

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Posted by Elvin Ruler on 29-04-2004 at 19:01:

Sheesh, you'd think you guys'd get bored of torturing me with that stuff by now. Right? Uh, guys...*watches as Cep opens book of doggerel*

Aaaaaahhhh!!!!!

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Posted by Firebird on 30-04-2004 at 17:58:

I think for me it has to be books with gratuitous swearing.

I have been getting introduced to a few things bookwise later where they are trying to tell a story of growing up in hard times and do it by swearing every other word

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Posted by Elvin Ruler on 30-04-2004 at 18:15:

Those get pretty boring after a while, yeah. My mom always told me that it was obvious I had a small vocabulary and thinking process if I had to resort to swearing. ^_^ So it always makes me wonder if the author is any good if there's a lot of swearing. It really bogs the story down for me.

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Posted by Berg Katse on 09-05-2004 at 23:08:

The list of books never to read? Oh, I'm such a critic, it would be SO long!

How about a series of books that has my ire right now? The "Left Behind" series of Christian novels. A series of books that deals with what happens when the Rapture occurs and the Anti-Christ and Satan run amok on Earth for seven years. Imagine reading a book where all the blessed Christians are saved (the ones abusing Iraqi POWs, perhaps? Or the ones killing abortion doctors? Or the clergy sexually abusing children?), and the leader of the UN is viewed as the Anti-Christ (Kofi Annan, I never thought you had it in you!). And this series is raking it in, big time. Particularly in the US (how much you want to bet its popular in the Bible Belt?).

It just sickens me that in a day and age where tolerance is needed, one of the largest grossing book series is preaching that indeed, one religion (Christianity) is better than the others, and when this Rapture occurs and all the good people are whisked away to be with God, the rest of us are left behind to wallow in the mess THEY helped make.

Personally, I can only think of a handful of people on this planet who deserve to be whisked off to any paradise. Oddly enough, only one of them is Christian (Mother Teresa), and she's already been carried off. If God thinks segregation is the way to go, he must have never been forced to sit in the back of the bus.

As a wise bumper stick once told me: "If the Rapture comes...can I have your car?"

Katse

Posted by tampitt on 10-05-2004 at 02:12:

quote:

[I] And this series is raking it in, big time. Particularly in the US (how much you want to bet its popular in the Bible Belt?).
Katse

This is just one of the many reasons why I hate living in the Bible Belt...those "Christian" folk scare me.

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Posted by Buffy on 10-05-2004 at 02:28:

Sigh....

And as popular culture tells us, Bibles are evil.

Hard to be a Christian in today's society. I am blamed for everything. Sad1

Not to spark a big debate here, but I would like to gently point out that I have learned intolerance and hate and blanket condemnation of a belief system and culture is not a Christian value, any more than it is a Muslem, Hindu, Wiccan, Atheist, or Agnostic value. Intolerance and Hate stems from human failings and fears, not religion itself, whatever flavor it is. "When Religion Becomes A Social Club" tsk. (or would that be "Organized Religion: The Conglomeration of Faiths"?)

I am a Christian who happily lives in the Bible Belt. I wouldn't think of condemning anyone on the basis of my religion. It is hurtful, and useless and goes against everything I have learned. And no, I really don't think i'm in the minority of Christians.

Of course, it sounds like Kat was criticizing western society as a whole for praising intolarance, with the flavor of the week being intolerant christianity.... If that is the intended message instead, I'd say, search deeper. Pop culture labels that the media slaps at us are nothing but depressing you know? Hard to find good in sensational headlines...and half hour psychumentaries.

Actually, I didn't care for the Left Behind series either. I just didn't think it was very well written and was entirly too full of propaganda. And truthfully, as someone who works in a library in the heart of the Bible Belt, I can't say that the Left Behind series is any more popular here than anywhere else. It appeals to a segement of people, just like any other book might appeal to any segment. Short version: If you are looking for unbiased, broad, wellwritten storytelling, Left Behind is not the series for you. If you are searching for passionate glorification of Christianity, to the exclusion of all else, you might just like it.

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Posted by Yuki on 10-05-2004 at 03:26:

Let's not forget that the Bible was authored about 2000 years ago when the structure of the society and everything else is so different from nowadays..

Do not misunderstand me, I truly believe that religion holds a very important place in every society both in the formation of the culture, moral and value of the society.. But remember that religion is totally practiced and interpreted by people.. the meaning of a religious life is totally up to interpretation as well.. it could range from leading a God-fearing and obeying life, loving your neighbours, accept 'sinners' and 'good-people' alike.... to killing off all your adversaries..

Religion... as have been known for ages.. is a very powerful tool to manipulate people.. and has been used as such as long as there had been human beings..

Unfortunately, the aforementioned series of books sounds like just another tool for such manipulation. You can't blame some folks in wanting to gain control over believers and steer them towards remaining a certain religion. And we must all admit that fear is a very useful means in achieving it. But as it has been said, it would appeal to certain brands of people.. to the general public.. *snort*

Anyhow.. just my 2 cents..

Yuki

Posted by Tengu on 10-05-2004 at 03:33:

Lets face it, xtianity is `not` a tolerant religion full stop. Say compared to Islam, who struggle with being tolerant, (read the `Arabian nights`) Buddists, who dont care, and Hindus who are too busy being Hindus.

pagans are intolerant too, come to think of it

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Posted by Buffy on 10-05-2004 at 03:40:

Kinda what I was saying with the whole look deeper thing. If I looked for intolerance, I can find it anywhere. If I look for acceptance, I can find that too... No matter what flavor.

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Posted by Cep on 10-05-2004 at 09:11:

I think I covered this in another rant so you should all know my feelings about religion whatever it is Big Grin

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Posted by Berg Katse on 10-05-2004 at 11:54:

I have looked deeper into this subject and I know exactly what is wrong with religion. We are what is wrong with religion. I love religion, I love spirituality--it's some of the worshippers I can't stand.

Katse